What life, especially because of Gerry, has taught me….

It’s been ONE year and  just past the exact time (12:10 ES) that I had to let you go, and let you have the wings, wings that you needed, and deserved.  Even though you were was only able to be with me for a year and a week from your diagnosis, and surgery, and endless pills, I haven’t given up faith that you will send me someone new, that you know I will love…not quite as much as you…but certainly with my heart and soul.

YOU were a superhero in my eyes, and this last year has been very loooog, and lonely at times, without you.  I’ve slowly gotten used to the absence of hearing your tail thump any time I walked by your bedroom, as well as ANY room you were in (and I don’t count on the same, if and when I do adopt another special unique creature).  I’ve made amazing new online friends since you’ve gone, especially the support, wisdom and words from a nation of other moms and dads at an online site, called Tripawds. (Remember that silver thing I often had on my lap, as you sat with me on the couch.  The thing you used to wrap your head around to let me know you were bored, or wanted my attention?  I found them on THAT thing.

I love you STILL so VERY, very much my Beau….All of those tears represent the chicken cubes I don’t get to make for you anymore.  Keep watching after me.

I miss and love you baby boy, and Daddy does too!

About danielle

I am a rescue mom and school teacher. Gerry came to me from Texas, after he "failed" as a hunting dog. He had NOT had an easy life. I was three years divorced, and we saved each other. Last week I learned he has osteosarcoma. Our world feels upside down...while everyone else is right side up.
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4 Responses to What life, especially because of Gerry, has taught me….

  1. dobemom says:

    Very wise words indeed. Thinking of you on this bittersweet anniversary…you released him from pain while your heart was shattering. Wishing you peace, and hoping Gerry sends you a new soul in need of love.

    Paula and Warrior Angel Nitro

  2. danielle says:

    XOXOXOXO

  3. jerry says:

    Wow. A year can go so fast, and so slow. And inbetween as we learn to get our heads around the fact that life is different on our own, our heroes watch us, hoping that we are making the most of life just as they did. You sure are, and I have no doubt Gerry is proud of you and his daddy. Somewhere he watches, and celebrates your courage and appreciation of life’s gifts.

    My heart goes out to you on this difficult anniversary. May your day be filled with kindness, love and sweet remembrance of his beautiful soul and unforgettable life that you had together.

    And Gerry, thank you for allowing your momma to become part of our family. We are so grateful that we got to know you.

    (((hugs))))

  4. tinsch says:

    I still have two and a half months to go to the one year mark and I am dreading it already. While probably all of us just kind of scramble and carry on it still hurts so much and -for me anyway- the hurt returns in waves.
    I just had 12 pictures blown up and printed and put them on a wall. It seems like a little too much but was something I felt I needed for myself.
    They will never leave us completely, or maybe a piece of us will always be with them because I know I will never be whole again.
    Gerry earned his wings but we know, don’t we, that the connection will never be completely severed and if there was a way to ask him I am sure he would say that he’ll always look after you – forever.
    Hugs
    Tina
    without Manni

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